How to Make Your Divorce as Difficult as Possible

I read somewhere that readers appreciate "How To" lists.  Since I couldn't think of one that hasn't already been done to death, here is a reverse "How to" list:

If you'd like to make your divorce as negative as possible, be sure to:

1. Bad mouth your soon-to-be-ex to anyone who will listen to you.

2. Make life changing decisions. Don't consult a lawyer. Or consult one way after the fact.

3. Try to alienate your children from your spouse. Or simply explain everything that has happened to you, and ask them to side with you or to speak to your spouse on your behalf.

4. Post detailed play-by-plays on your social media accounts.

5. Use litigation to exact revenge. Be surprised when litigation doesn't make you feel any better. Prioritize "winning," "making a point" or "the principle of the thing," over your own self-interest.

Obviously, this is an over simplification of complicated issues. Everyone loves winning, and making a point. Right?  Divorce is complex and highly emotional.  But don't do ALL, or most of these, repeatedly, and expect a positive impact on your divorce. 

Areas of Practice

We receive a number of calls on a regular basis, inquiring about the services we provide. The short answer is that we handle all areas of family law in Maryland and Washington D.C.  However, to clear up questions, we've created a new page on the website that describes our areas of practice a little more fully.  Please check it out! 

http://www.markhamlegal.com/legal-services/

Starting a business... It's a New Year!

I started this firm in 2015, and I am so proud of what it has become, and the high quality of work that we do here every day. 

One of the most unexpected things about starting my own business, is being approached by others who want to do the same.   It has been so rewarding talking to others about their (sometimes previously unspoken) dreams to start their own businesses, hearing their aspirations and talking about my experiences. 

When I’m asked “how I did it” I tell them my story.  In a nutshell, it consists of taking a leap of faith and working very hard day in and day out, with a group of wonderful women who do the same.  Then I tell them, “If I did it, you can do it too.”

A good friend of mine had been dreaming of starting her own retail business for some time.  After speaking to me about the opening of my firm for many months, she decided to expedite her plans.  She told me that I was an “inspiration” to her.  That was such an unexpected compliment that I never imagined I would receive. I am so pleased that I could motivate or inspire someone else to chase her dream and make it seem all the more attainable.  I know that I have been inspired by so many others, in the legal industry, and outside of it as well.

So, looking back on my 2015, and looking forward to 2016, I say, life is short.  Chase your dream.  If you’re thinking of starting a business, consider giving it a fair shake this year.  I wish you all the best in your endeavors!

Things I like about practicing family law, in no particular order

Things I like about practicing family law, in no particular order...

1. Helping people envision a new future for themselves. People tend to start out disillusioned and unclear on the future. I like helping them figure out next steps. 

2. Getting to know interesting people. Most of my clients are extremely interesting and I love hearing about their work, families and what makes them tick. Getting to know each client is an important step in helping them identify and reach their goals. 

3. Working with professionals who are experts in their fields. I often work with mental health professionals (social workers, psychologists, psychiatrists), accountants and financial advisors. They've receiving extensive training in areas where I've received minimal training by comparison. I love having some of their knowledge rub off on me. 

4. Problem solving. Every day I am faced with problems to solve. I love brainstorming, particularly while mediating. Are the parties fighting over how to divide up the pie? Redefine the pie. Get another pie. Or a bowl of fruit. Is it even about the pie? Or something else?

5. Every day is different. And that's an understatement.

Do one thing every day that scares you

Do one thing every day that scares you.- Eleanor Roosevelt

On April 13-14, 2016 the Montgomery County Bar Association is again sponsoring a two day training called the Rita Rosenkranz family law training. This popular program occurs every year and provides valuable information and voluminous materials to new practitioners and those hoping begin taking Family law cases. I will be speaking to the group as part of the panel, and my topic will be "Litigating Custody Cases."

Every year I attempt to set a personal goal and this year has been the "year of public speaking." My paralegal was amazed when I told her that I don't have much experience speaking to crowds. She assumed that speaking multiple times per week in front of magistrate and judges would be the same as speaking to a group. To me it certainly doesn't feel the same!

When I first started practicing law, any moment that I was in the court room, and addressing the court I was nervous and conscious of every word that came out of my mouth. Now, I am in court so often that it feels like second nature. A few weeks ago I was in court for five different hearings in five days. Yet when I speak to a crowd the old butterflies return, at least for the first few minutes. Fortunately, I'm finding that the more I speak to crowds, the fewer butterflies. 

So far, I'm enjoying my year of public speaking.  It's good to do something a little scary. That's how you grow.  Now I need to decide what to do in 2016.

2016 SuperLawyers Rising Star!

I am pleased to announce that I have been selected for both Maryland and Washington DC as a 2016 SuperLawyers Rising Star.  Actually, this is a full recap of my SuperLawyers nominations to date!

2016 Washington DC Rising Stars
2016 Maryland Rising Stars
2015 Washington DC Rising Stars
2015 Maryland Rising Stars
2014 Washington DC Rising Stars
2014 Maryland Rising Stars
2013 Washington DC Rising Stars
2013 Maryland Rising Stars
2012 Maryland Rising Stars
2011 Maryland Rising Stars

Thank you to my peers who nominated me. Whoever they may be!

Bitcoin CLE- February 4, 2016

I'm helping to plan and execute an exciting CLE in February, which is the first of its kind for Montgomery County, Maryland.   The vast majority of my peers seem to still be in the dark about virtual currencies, if they have heard of them at all.  It is not to be missed by local attorneys.

Bitcoin for Lawyers: Bitcoin, Virtual Currencies, and the New Asset Transfer Paradigm

Speaker: Andrew M. Hinkes, Esq., Berger Singerman LLP.

In this seminar you will understand bitcoin and other virtual currencies, how they function and operate, how they are regulated, how they are taxed, how they compare to other forms of value transfer, and how they do, and will impact multiple existing areas of law.  

Topics include:

-              How distributed virtual currencies actually work

-              How distributed virtual currencies are (currently) regulated

-              Virtual Currencies and Tax

-              Virtual Currencies and Real Estate Transactions

-              Virtual Currencies and Litigation

-              Impact of bitcoin on clawback/fraudulent transfer actions/insolvency proceedings

-              Future applications of bitcoin and blockchain technology

-              Digital currencies and regulatory arbitrage

Register Online: http://montbar.site-ym.com/events/event_details.asp?id=712575

Signing Documents

In my practice I often need to obtain client signatures on documents very quickly.  In litigation, they must sign under oath their pleadings (Complaint or Counterclaim, Motions, etc.) and discovery responses (Answers to Interrogatories, Response to Request for Admissions).  Once in a while a client needs to drop what he or she is doing to receive an emailed document, print it, sign it, and scan it back to me.  10 years ago it was iffy whether the client would even have ready access to a scanner.  These days, luckily, most do, which makes it easier for me.  However, I also always look for ways to make my client's life easier.  It occurred to me that there should be a way to sign a document on your phone, and of course, it turns out there's an app for that.  

I have been using Sign Easy for a few weeks now. http://getsigneasy.com/  They have an app for apple devices, web and android phones.  You pull up the document, sign it with your finger and then email yourself the document.  So far, it has been working great.  

What happens on Facebook does not stay on Facebook

I have introduced Facebook photos and screenshots as evidence in many a divorce or custody trial.  But, I have yet to meet an attorney who has successfully subpoenaed Facebook for this information.  I assume it has happened somewhere, ever, but not in my neck of the woods. Yet in my world of DC/Montgomery County divorces, Facebook contains a lot of valuable information and it's a struggle to figure out how to get it ALL in discovery.

What's significant that can be found on Facebook?  People post photos of their paramours, how they spend their money (vacations, designer stuff, you name it), and they tag their locations.  It bears on finances and judgment. Information from Facebook posts can be pertinent to alimony, child support, custody-  the full gamut. 

I have requested the content of a party's Facebook page in discovery, but the question is, what is "everything"?  I usually get dribs and drabs in response.  Every time that person "likes" an article, do I need that?  How does a person even obtain that information, assuming they want to bother to give it to me?  What about if certain posts are public and others are private?  If someone is posting privately, how will I ever know whether everything has been produced in discovery?

Have you ever scrolled the feed of a frequent user and just hit Expand, Expand, Expand?  It can be a daunting project to unravel all the posts and print or take screen shots of them all. And you still can't be sure you got it all, for example, if a post has been deleted.

When I am preparing the discovery request, I need to be concerned about tailoring it narrowly enough to make it possible for the person to reasonably respond. But I always want it to encompass everything I need.  

So... I just realized something that blew my mind a little bit.  I noticed while using Facebook, the ability to download all activity.

 And, with that, I'll be amending my discovery requests accordingly in the very near future. I'm looking forward to seeing what it yields.

Hiding Money

I haven't crunched any real numbers but I would say anywhere from 20-40% of my clients mention in the initial consultation, the fear that their spouse is hiding money. Unless their spouse is a small business owner, particularly one dealing with a lot of cash, I tell them that hiding money is actually harder than they probably think.  

For one, the IRS is in the business of finding money.  Most financial accounts generate at least a modest amount of reportable interest or dividends.  More than $10/yr will trigger a 1099 to the IRS, meaning that even if a spouse doesn't report the income, the IRS will soon catch up to him/her and when that happens, the divorce attorney will catch up too.

I've heard a lot of stories over the years about how parties going through a divorce hide money.  Cash withdrawals, buying gift cards, lines of credit, fishy "loans" to family members... to name just a few.  In discovery we ask for statements for checking, savings, bonds, retirement, certificated stock, etc., including all the usual ways and places people invest their money.  Some of the weirder cases I have had involved various valuable collectibles such as baseball cards, antiques and the like, which are hard to value and can actually be physically hidden.

But now, there's a new breed of "hidden money" in our midst.  Virtual currency.  What's that?  You've never heard of that? My friend Andrew Hinkes  is an authority on the subject and has made me aware of the complications related to virtual currency (i.e., bitcoin, lite coin, doge coin).  Here's a taste of the level of complication you didn't even know existed:

http://www.insidecounsel.com/2014/07/29/blockchains-smart-contracts-and-the-death-of-speci

Confused?  At least now you know what you don't know, which is a start. Virtual currency is becoming more relevant and prolific by the day. Attorneys and clients need to be knowledgable and aware to avoid any pitfalls. If you're an attorney, educate yourself before its too late.